Hello mortals,

Meet my inmates.

I have two other animals bunking in my cell. If you have read the “About me” section you will know which ones I am referring to. If not,  read it now. Who am I to do your job? I don’t understand why I can’t be put with (at least) descent cell-mates.  “Worthless”, Ugh, “Worthless”, is happy (Though I don’t know why) with people.

He get fed every night, he gets treats, cookies, belly rubs, and very rarely (I should say too rarely) gets a bath. He gets taken on walks, gets to play with other dogs (The sight is very pathetic, Trust me). If you could see things from his point of view, you would think it was a comedy blog.

“Un-god like”, well, she’s not the brightest bulb. Personally, I think she took one too many falls from the refrigerator. There’s not much to say about her, because, well, there’s not much in her brain. She’s dependent on their food. Even after she just finishes her food, she goes and she cries for more! She lays everywhere, when the mortals walk she’s right beneath their feet (Their ugly feet, if I may say so myself)

She’ll stand on the floor, she’ll run on the floor, she’ll even fall asleep right on the floor! Doesn’t she know that it is extremely disrespectful to our godly descendants to be on the floor in any way, shape, or form?! She’ll even sit (On the floor, I might add) and eat Kitty litter!

I have to go. The mortals are coming. They can not know our kind has the ability to do this. I hope you found my inmates, ah, entertaining. Wait, no I don’t. I hope you found it OFFENSIVE!

Jail bird cat,