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Hello, my name is Padme. I am a cat. Yes, you silly mortals, cat’s can write. As I was saying, I am a calico cat, my name is Padme and so on ( I figure you mortals need all the help you can get when it comes to understanding things. I will try to make my entree’s as simple as possible.).

I would tell you my age, but that would be very improper as a lady ( Maybe not for you mortals). I live with a rather annoying family of four, a dog, and another cat. For your information, I don’t refer to them as anything more than “Mortals” or “Servants“. Now, the animals are referred to as “Worthless” (The dog) and very,very “Un-god like” (The other cat).

This journal is about me, my prison, the other cat who is far too needy, the dog who is seemingly always slap-happy,and the idiot people I live with who call each other “Family“.

Let me be clear: This is a cat writing these things, not a mortal pretending. Have you wondered why the grammar is so good?

I’d thank you for reading (Or preparing to read), but I you are just mere mortals. As for the cats who read, Thank you. Let this be a warning to you. Being imprisoned by mortals does happen. If you are free, run. Enjoy your freedom while it lasts. I can’t say much more, but someday, this will happen to you. So be ready for your service.

Jail bird cat,

Padme

P.S. Wondering why you can understand cat? Well, in the middle on the night, I snuck in and put a cat translator in your brain.

That’s why.

 

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